"He addeth forthwith that his children must be faithful, not accused of riot, nor rebels. This is well worth the marking: for in the epistle to Timothy also, we see that St Paul contented not himself with the minister's person, but would have their wives to be in good order, insomuch that if a man for his own part live honestly, and without reproach, yet if his wife be of a naughty conversation, this fault returneth to him: though the wife be to be blamed, yet men continually say thus, "See, such a minister's wife is of lewd behavior, and we see there are many vanities and dissolutions which the husband might remedy well enough. Therefore he is to be blamed for all the fault." For if he cannot govern his house (saith St Paul) how shall he govern the house of God? How can he govern a whole people, both men and women, both great and small, when he cannot govern his wife? And therefore let us mark that in this place, when he speaketh of children, it is to the end we should mark whether a man be meet to govern the people of God, and to rule his house and his church well, and have showed the effect of it in his own house. Therefore if a man do not only show that he walketh in the fear of God, and abstaineth from all evil, but also causeth them that are in his charge to serve and honor God, and suffereth not his house either to be a stews [brothel], nor a dicing [gambling] house, nor a tavern, to be drunken in, nor such like, neither suffereth his servants, or his wife, or his children, to be lewd or dissolute the least jot that may be, or use any bravery or any other vanity—when a man governeth his household in this sort, then we know that he is watchful, and hath a zeal of God, and wisdom and gravity in him. So that this is a proof to show, that he is fit to serve and govern the church of God. For this cause St Paul said precisely, let their children be faithful, not accused of riot, nor rebels. He setteth down here precisely four qualities. The first is that the children be faithful: for if we should choose one to preach the word of God, that hath not taught his family, that hath children, whom if a man ask a reason of their faith, they are not able to say a word, how will he be able to bring strangers to the faith, when he hath not brought his own? And therefore we must begin at this end. If we see he hath instructed his household, and behaved himself well in his house, we may think he will do far better when he is in higher place, and that he will employ himself generally to the edifying of all the people. So that religion goeth here in the first place. And next to that it must be seen that they be not accused of riot. When St Paul putteth down this word, his meaning is, that there shall no dissoluteness be seen in them. For the question is not here, that process should be made against them before a judge, or that any should take part against them to accuse them, but he meaneth that no intemperancy should be noted in them, nor any markable faults in minister's children. For if a man allege and say, "Ho, how now? What is he that reproveth my children? If any man meddle to do them wrong, I will make him smart for it." If a man (I say) make a goodly show to be zealous of his, and his children's honor and in the mean season give them liberty to do evil, insomuch that men mock at him, is such an one to be excused? Yet notwithstanding we see a number that think themselves goodly fellows, when they are warned of such lewdness as is committed in their houses, they have this strain2 [reply] in their mouths, "Ho, if any man meddleth with me, he shall be sure of his answer, let him be sure I will talk with him, I will give him well to understand whom he hath to do withal." But in the mean season he is mocked at, and all his train, his wife is made a laughingstock, he seeth and knoweth she is stark naught, and yet he will not bear out the matter and is he not worthy to be a cuckold [husband of adulteress]? A man cannot abide his children should be evil spoken of, and yet he will suffer them to play lewd parts, give them as good lessons as you can, they will mock at them, they will despite God, you shall see nothing but wickedness in them, and yet they must not be warned of the danger they be in. They see God well enough, they go the highway and path to destruction, and they cannot abide to be drawn out of it. But because they are sick folks that will not be healed and seeing they cast away all remedies that are brought them, let them perish as miserable and wretched creatures as they are. And therefore let us mark well, when St Paul saith that the children of the ministers of God's word, must not be accused of riot, that he meaneth thereby, that there must be no dissolute and lewd kind of life perceived in them, but that they use themselves honestly, and give no occasion of offense, or of any evil speeches or murmurings against them. This is the second point. The third is, that they be not rebels: that is to say, that he that is appointed to preach the word, and to govern and instruct the church of God, must take good heed that his children be not stubborn, that they be not like wild beasts, hard and cumbersome to be ruled. For if he cannot do this with his children, what will he do to them that nothing belong to him? If he cannot keep under a little child in his pride and stubbornness, what will he do with the whole people? This is St Paul's meaning. But yet let us mark that he speaketh in such wise to them that must be chosen ministers, that this doctrine is general to all. He doth not teach ministers what they should be, as though his talk were directed to them: but he showeth what manner of men they must be that must be chosen to this office and calling. Beware (saith he) you choose not such an one, as you cannot govern his house, to put him to an harder and more weighty office. And again when he speaketh of the choosing of ministers this goeth further. For if a man be chosen to preach the word of God, and he order himself evil, both him and his house, it is no inheritance to him, he must be cut off, such a stumbling block may not be suffered. And as every man must have an eye to himself (I speak of us that are placed in a public office), and take heed to that which St Paul appointeth, to know what manner of men must be chosen, so must every man also take pains to frame himself to the rule that is contained here, and let us pray to God to give us grace to walk so, that his word be not mocked at through our means, and that our sins cause not the wicked to blaspheme against God's name and say, such an one is a blasphemer, a wicked man, and therefore a goodly bishop, that no such words may come from the mouths of the wicked, but that their mouths may be stopped, and they found wicked when they so revile us. And he showeth moreover what manner of men the Christians ought to be. True it is, that the ministers of the word of God go before: but yet notwithstanding other must frame themselves to this time also, every man according to his calling. And if God have been so gracious to a man as to make him an husband, let this be his care to be linked and coupled with his wife, that he be not forepossessed with whoredom, that his heart be not upon other, but he follow his way, knowing that he is married in God's name, and that he must be faithful to his mate, seeing God hath given her unto him. Thus must all Christians though they be private men, so walk in the state of marriage (if they be called unto it) that every one content himself with his yoke-fellow, and live honestly and without all dissension. And again, they whom God hath so far honored to give them children, let them consider that they are so much more bound to God to take pains that their children be well brought up. And if they will have them brought up well, they must always begin with religion. For children may in show have all the virtues in the world, but that is nothing, unless they fear God and honor him. As we see a number that will take great pains to bring up their children in the affairs of this world. Truth it is they will have masters for their children, but it shall be to teach them some goodly fair show, they shall have some three words of Latin to make a show at the table, to know how to talk and make fair faces to the worldward, but to know God, there is no talk, no news of that. But this is not the way, this is to set the cart before the horse. Therefore let us learn by St Paul's example, to begin at this end to instruct children. For if they once know God, it is a good foundation to build upon—but without it, there is nothing but ruin and confusion; for if we take pains to instruct our children in religion, and in the true and pure knowledge of God, and of his truth, their life will be answerable to it, that is to say, they will be honest, they will not be dissolute, they will not be riotous, they will be so well bridled, that they will not give themselves to delicates, nor to drunkenness, nor to lewd games, nor to such like things, there will be no such evil disposition in them. This is the second point that St Paul commandeth us in this place. But because young men are cursed cattle to rule, St Paul writeth that they must be humble and easy to be taught: for if there be no modesty in little children, a man shall take great pains to instruct them, but they will kick as unbroken colts, that bite the bit, and run against their masters. And therefore St Paul set down this humbleness precisely for the chiefest virtue that may be in young folks, but as it is requisite, so is it very rare. Let us consider and see what young folks are. How do children govern themselves nowadays? True it is, that fathers deserve often times their children should pluck out their eyes. For they have no care to instruct them in the fear of God; and are they not worthy to be paid with the same? But it is to be lamented when we see rebellious children, which cannot be tamed do what we can, when they are but little ones, they cannot be made to taste of any goodness. And are they come to age? I say not to the age of men, as though they were at men's stature, but when they are past being little children, and are young striplings as we call them, ho, yet they must needs be called men, and they think they have great wrong done them, if they be called otherwise. They might well enough be kept at school yet ten years longer, and have the rod, and yet they will be taken for mighty fellows. And I have told them too often, "away you lobs must you be men? It were more meet for you to be under the rod, and be kept in coram [discipline]." And if men would have been ruled quietly then, they needed not to have wept now, such rigor needed not to have been used as we see now, they needed not to have been punished so much to their shame as they are now, if there had been any wit and discretion in them. And therefore we must mark this which St Paul saith here, so much the better, and let fathers beware they keep in their children well and straitly, and if they will needs be men when they are yet under the rod, let them not spare them. Truth it is that parents may not grieve their children, nor give them occasion through their too over-rough dealing to become naught, but yet they must fear, that their children being thus hard to govern, take not liberty to give themselves to all wickedness, and to become so lewd, that they cannot be brought again to the right way; and therewithal also, let young folks know, that unless they have this modesty in them, and this grace to suffer themselves quietly to be ruled by their superiors, we must say fie upon all their virtues: as indeed it is nothing, there is nothing but pride and filthiness in them, and God will also bring them to confusion. And therefore let every man learn this lesson, as St Paul teacheth it all men in this place. Now let us fall down before the face of our good God, confessing our faults, and praying him that he would give us such a feeling of them, that from the greatest to the smallest of us, we may be all beaten down in ourselves and have no other, etc."
Calvin, John. Sermons on Titus . TeXSet Press. Kindle Edition.
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